Mindfulness Makes Room

Do you make space for all of it?

I am feeling so melancholy today. And I know that happy and vibrant is much more appealing on the internet, in general. But, I think it’s just as important to be mindful of our full range of emotions.

I am at the beginning of my Spring cleanse and I know that I am working through some things. I was holding onto something or something was holding onto me. Despite daily meditation and tuning in to my body and mindfulness, I still have cobwebs to clear. Food is a powerful coverup--vice. And you may have other ones. But it’s hard to step out of that pattern unless things are shaken up a bit. So I have things coming up and I want to share that it’s not always *rainbows and butterflies. Again, that the main reason I am passionate about mindfulness and meditation is to experience the fullness of life. If you’re sad, you’re sad and what is it? If you’re joyful, be completely with that and expand upon it.

So what do I do?

I know that my meditation wants to look a little different today. I heard once that when you cry, really cry. I invited that experience in. I picked up my journal, not to write an intention or to record any wisdom after I meditate, but to put pen to paper and allow my inner voice to show up on paper and form in this way. It was just one thought. One question that turned into a few paragraphs and a realization. By just following the trail of thoughts and questions, I understood what prompted the release or expression of these sad feelings. And of course, it’s my mom. A passing memory I had earlier. Seven years ago and I am still working through grief, regrets, unsureness, wishes.

Music has always been soothing to me, so I also turn to this outlet. My mindfulness exercise is listening and feeling into a moody album that I love. I’m thankful - I am thankful for this letting go. For these tools. That I find my way back to them. Because whenever I do something that is part of a self-care routine or ritual, I am often surprised by what comes up.

We can walk through life happy and excelling and we can take a rest and sit with less shiny emotions. We are humans after all. We are capable of feeling a wide range of emotions and it’s what makes us multidimensional and interesting—ourselves. Empathetic. Compassionate.

Self-compassion, tenderness towards ourselves is compassion and connection in the world around us.

*’Rainbows and Butterflies’: my husband’s term for how I seem to feel about life usually. ;)

And here is the source for the crying wisdom:

We were seeing U Pandita 6 days a week for brief individual meetings to get feedback on our meditation. Given his sternness, I didn't really want to tell him about my sadness. But finally I did. He asked, "Are you crying?" "Uh-oh" I thought. I hastily replied, "Not much, just a very little bit." U Pandita shook his head dolefully and to my complete amazement said, "Every time you cry you should cry your eyes out. That way you'll get the best relief."

-Sharon Salzberg, Real Happiness

Interested in Journaling? Here is a nice article with tips : https://www.wellandgood.com/good-advice/journaling-benefits-mental-health/